Saturday, December 4, 2010

there are fifteen, okay thirteen, minutes until i actually have to worry about getting ready for work. i'm sitting here in my tights and my tank top just so i can write down this feeling, right now, for the world to see.

it's the same feeling that i've had for over 1095 days now, but as i grow and change, it grows and changes. this morning i woke up alone, and so sleepy, but intrigued by a dream. it was one of those mornings where you open your eyes, look at your clock, realize you have a few hours before you actually have to wake up, and throw yourself back into your dream. i'm not sure why i did this with this dream, but i did, regardless. it was bizarre, but i am very happy that i did because then i woke up happy. i woke up feeling this amazing feeling and slight inspiration for one thing. the thing that it all always goes back to. it sounds corny but it's almost the thing that my soul and heart are drawn back to when i'm feeling the lack of life, the lack of inspiration, and sometimes even the lack of love. all while i was just by myself in my bed, in my empty apartment, in silence.

it's waking up with mornings like this that make me always remember why. everyone needs to remember why sometimes, even those who don't care.

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